Professor Optimism Quiz

NEW ENTRIES! Scroll down to Edit March 22, 2011 for  Goetz, Welker, Eilers, Lynch, Michelson, Clifton, Dekker, Hartle, and Ballinger!

Note: The following is NOT a transcript of actual interviews. It is a caricature of a few of my professors. Add your own to the end 🙂

Is the glass half-empty, or half-full?

Professor Latino, Digital Tools and Media Management:

The glass is half-full. But it doesn’t have enough lighting. And have you tried duplicating it in Final Cut Pro yet?

Dr. Bordeaux, Chemistry:

Well, technically, the glass is neither half-full nor half-empty. The glass can hold 300mL of H2O and it is currently holding only 139 mils. And that won’t be on the test, it’s just something I thought you might find interesting.

Professor Leeper, Intro to Digital Media Arts:

I’m not going to make a judgment call about whether the glass is half-full or half-empty. That’s something I want you to figure out on your own. You don’t really have the right to say whether the glass is half-full or half-empty until you’ve experienced it for yourself. And really, I think we talk way too much ABOUT the glass and don’t spend nearly enough time listening… to the glass… itself. We’ve talked enough; it’s the glass’s turn. I’ll get your comments on the blogs.

Dr. Brautigam, Western Civilization:

In a historical context, the glass has been both half-full AND half-empty. Of course, for Yankees fans, the glass is always half-full, even when it’s EMPTY, KEIRSH!

Professor Ruiz, Wellness:

If the glass is still half-full, it’s probably because you need to drink more water.

Mr. Cotton, Academic Writing and Research:

The glass is half-full, oKAY? And I noticed the same thing on your papers; so many of you titled them “Is the glass half-empty, or half-full?” BE CREATIVE WITH YOUR TITLES!

From Cara:
Dr. Tait, Bible and Religion:

I think that the glass is really a metaphor for something else, so there is no water literally in the glass, and there is no glass.

EDIT March 28, 2010
Dr. Smith, Western Civilization:

It doesn’t really matter whether it’s half-full or half empty. But there is that problem of the glass only containing half of the alcohol that could be in the glass. And when something goes wrong, who do you blame? The French! They can’t do anything right.

Dr. Clark, every class he teaches:

Oh my gosh, the glass is half full, and I’m SO excited about how half-full the glass is. There is so much potential in this glass. I mean, last semester the glass was half-empty. I am SO proud of you guys. Keep up the good work.

Mrs. Duffer, Intro to Theatre:

That is an excellent question! What does everyone think? Is the glass half-full, or half empty?

Jeremy Knoll, Digital Foundations:

Hmm… So what does everyone think? Take a look… You know, you may want to put a shadow on that side of the glass. Draw it by hand; you don’t want it to look photoshopped.

Josh Watson, Audio for Film:

It’s not really so important whether the glass is half-full or half empty; what’s important is your decision on whether or not the sound of the glass hitting the table is actually important or not. You may want to leave it out if it’s not that important.

EDIT March 22, 2011
Ron Goetz, Intro to Psychology

That’s a very good question, and I’m glad you asked it. Whether the glass is half full or half empty really depends on the person. Some people see it as half-full, and some people see it as half-empty. Oh! Did I tell you guys about work today? All the kids parents must’ve given them kool-aid before they came to school today.

Tyler Welker, Motion Graphics

Well, Andrew Kramer over at VideoCopilot has a tutorial on that that you should watch, but basically, the glass is half full, if that makes sense.

Dr. Kent Eilers, Biblical History and Literature

I think you’re raising some very good questions, and it’s good for you to wrestle with them at this stage in your spiritual growth, and that’s something you need to sort of work out for yourself, within the guidelines of historical Christianity.

Kelly Lynch, Cinematography

OMG, that’s cute. What the f— difference does it make how full or empty the glass is? What’s important is whether it’s on a train or not. And whether the lighting is motivated. Yay, moviez! Lolz.

Dr. Michelson, C.S. Lewis

Screwtape wants you to think the glass is half-empty, but maybe it’s only that way because it’s afraid of being cannibalized.

Justin Clifton, Writing for the Screen

You have to start with a solid idea about the glass. Then you build your character, then the story structure, and THEN you actually write about the glass.

Rick Dekker, Producing

Well, I don’t think it really matters whether it’s half-full or half-empty. What matters is whether you’ve scheduled enough time and have enough budget to inclue the glass at all. When you write your budget, though, I want you to write it like you’re actually paying regular rates.

Sandra Hartle, DMA Assistant Person

Well, I think the glass is half-full. But I’ve never been to that class.

Bryan Balinger, Courtesy of Andrew Martin

What does that have to do with elephants?

About David M. Schell






7 responses to “Professor Optimism Quiz”

  1. Tim Bajema Avatar

    Hahaha very good David.

  2. Jenn Cooper Avatar

    Hahaha 🙂 I like it

  3. Justin Neer Avatar

    Mr. Cotton is the best.

  4. Keifer Lucchi Avatar

    That's great… wow…. lol

  5. Cara Bolley Avatar

    Tait: I think that the glass is really a metaphor for something else so there is no water literally in the glass and there is no glass.

  6. Brendan Shick Avatar

    This one of the most amazing things I've ever read.

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